Wendy is an old friend of mine; we
met on the playground of a small elementary school. We have never had a serious
fight, she can become irritated easily but she never tried to intentionally
hurt my feelings. When we entered high school, we would still see each other
despite the fact that we went to different schools. One day she told me she was
dieting and that she was cutting back calories. She went from not eating meat,
to not eating as much solid foods, to only eating soups, and eventually not
eating at all. She was very pretty and incredibly small, we would go to
restaurants together even though I did most of the eating. It was
strange to see her do this to herself but I did not question it because I
didn’t really know what she was doing to herself, all I knew was that the more
she lost weight the more compliments she would get.
She would starve herself, her parents were busy and she would rarely eat with them, which made it easy for her to skip meals. She would tell me that she would sometimes treat herself to a diet coke if she managed to not eat anything the whole day. Whenever she felt uneasy and she felt the absolute need to eat, she would eat only a hand full of trail mix or nuts. This went on for a couple of months until she was taken to the hospital on January of 2009, her doctor said she was anorexic. When I saw her in the hospital, she looked nothing like the colorful girl I met at the school playground. She was pale; she looked vulnerable and brittle, like an injured bird. It was incredibly upsetting seeing my friend in this condition; I could not imagine how she could have felt.
Fortunately after she landed in the hospital she went to rehab, where she would meet with different specialists. Since then she has improved, she is in a much healthier state, it was not easy for her in any way but she restrained this mental illness and has since then gained weight and confidence. Watching her struggle through anorexia made me realize the true pressure that is put on girls and women to fit into a mold in order to be considered beautiful. Not many girls are taught from a young age that the images of women in the media are altered to the point of unreachable standards of beauty. Girls are told to fear rejection and to seek acceptance from others in order to evaluate their own value. Girls should be told to love and accept themselves, not neglect their bodies to the point of illness or death in order to fit into someone else’s standards.
She would starve herself, her parents were busy and she would rarely eat with them, which made it easy for her to skip meals. She would tell me that she would sometimes treat herself to a diet coke if she managed to not eat anything the whole day. Whenever she felt uneasy and she felt the absolute need to eat, she would eat only a hand full of trail mix or nuts. This went on for a couple of months until she was taken to the hospital on January of 2009, her doctor said she was anorexic. When I saw her in the hospital, she looked nothing like the colorful girl I met at the school playground. She was pale; she looked vulnerable and brittle, like an injured bird. It was incredibly upsetting seeing my friend in this condition; I could not imagine how she could have felt.
Fortunately after she landed in the hospital she went to rehab, where she would meet with different specialists. Since then she has improved, she is in a much healthier state, it was not easy for her in any way but she restrained this mental illness and has since then gained weight and confidence. Watching her struggle through anorexia made me realize the true pressure that is put on girls and women to fit into a mold in order to be considered beautiful. Not many girls are taught from a young age that the images of women in the media are altered to the point of unreachable standards of beauty. Girls are told to fear rejection and to seek acceptance from others in order to evaluate their own value. Girls should be told to love and accept themselves, not neglect their bodies to the point of illness or death in order to fit into someone else’s standards.
Martha,
ReplyDeleteI was able to view your post and I appreciate you sharing your experience with such a fragile situation. It is very unfortunate your friend had to endure that experience I can’t imagine how it felt.In today’s society one can easily see how certain images and messages in the media can cause a young person to develop an eating disorder or a distorted view of their overall body image. In your post you mentioned she would receive compliments on how great she looked which seemed to further her disorder. Its unfortunate to know that in current times the idea of perfection is so heavily pushed that it’s very difficult for some people to see themselves as beautiful or acceptable. It’s essential for us to teach our youth and others to be comfortable with the way they look and to embrace their physical differences.
Hi Marta,
ReplyDeleteYour story is so interesting and this true story can happen to anyone. It is really sad to see more of these eating disorder complications.
This is a mental illness which comes from the true pressure that is put on girls and women to look good and skinny. We need to be very care full about our teenager. Anorexia is an eating complication that involves in failure to stay at the minimum ideal body weight which is considered not healthy for the person’s age and height. A lot of teenagers mostly girls who has this kind of disorder may have a strong fear of gaining weight, even when they are not fat. They usually go through dangerous dieting, extreme exercise, or other approaches to lose more and more weight.
We live in the time that Social approaches that stimulate unrealistically tinny body forms may also contribute to being perfect or having a family who also has the same attitude about being fat or overweight or in general someone who has a negative self-esteem and a high level of adverse feelings. This kind of disorder can also happen because of some stressful life situations such as abuse or getting a new job. The only thing that we need to remember is, when we see people in this stage we need to get them help as soon as possible.
That was so well put. I have not met or known anyone that is anorexia but I know it exist. I know women feel like “thin is in” but, in reality it’s not. It is an unhealthy mental disorder that can kill.
ReplyDeleteMartha,
ReplyDeleteYour story is an eye-opener about the immense pressure that young females feel about being skinny. Somehow girls feel they need to lose weight to feel accepted in society. Your friend suffered from anorexia due to the stresses of needing to look a particular way as the need of acceptance. I’m glad that she was able to recover and realize that she is healthier than before.